" The most creative act you will ever undertake is the act of creating yourself."

Saturday, June 30, 2012

Living Frugally

Today, I started out with making home made laundry detergent! Whew, my sinus' are on fire! It's supposed to calculate out to less than 1cent per load. That would save us a ton of money! I found the recipe on Pinterest. If you want to follow my pins http://pinterest.com/kabischof/. The recipe I used is from the blog frugally green http://frugallygreen.blogspot.com/2008/05/how-to-make-your-own-laundry-soap.html. I took some pics myself and added a few ideas and tips. I would be really interested in finding a recipe for natural home made laundry soap. We are a sensitive bunch here! It took longer than I expected to cook the ingredients. The concoction never got quite as thick as honey but it did thicken. It is now sealed and resting in the basement.

Mom and I started my freezer recipes to prepare for when I start the Cleveland Clinic Pain Rehabilitation Program. Also, a Pinterest idea! I refused to Pinterest for the longest time. Kind-of silly now to think about it! I'm always so worried about people's impressions and opinions of me. Who gives a hoot! I mean really!! I am who I am, absolutely no shame in that. I love my life and who I am and who I am developing into. Anyway, we got 3 recipes done and I will post them throughout the week. Sunday we are going to pound out a bunch more (fingers crossed). We had to wait on meat to thaw. My real hope is that our fridge doesn't decide to stop working again in the middle of the night. It is stuffed full and working harder than usual.

In conclusion, I am so happy I succumbed to the Pinterest Borg;-) Family came for a brief visit to drop off more of my mom's stuff. Our house is bursting at the seams! I was able to help out a friend's sister by sending back something they needed that we didn't anymore! Always feels good when at the end of the day you can say, yes I helped someone today!

Thursday, June 28, 2012

Honing In

I am slowly coming around to think I may go ahead and steer this blog into my craft, etc. I may be learning but I am not slow. I am beginning to see no benefit in dragging this out. I think if I start shaping it as I go it will grow toward what I want it to be. An online journal with my life experiences but my soul purpose is to answer that age old question of Who I am. Everyday I am actively working toward finding my niche in this life. I want it to be something I have a passion for and get great enjoyment out of. All while hopefully helping others by sharing my experience, past, pain, hope and optimism. I am not going to be able to blog everyday. I have a very full life already. So, once I do a total face lift, I'll pick a day or two a week and those will be my blogging days. I'm really into finding things I enjoy doing that I could help provide for my family with, also. I will continue working on my crafts, art, sewing, etc and share those steps here on this blog. I am going to interlace this with date nights, vacations, etc.

So, In conclusion, I've got a plan and I'm going to work toward it and adjust as I go. On a more personal note, my husband and I are going to move forward with a formal adoption. It's what we've wanted and I just needed to give my daughter's biological father a second chance. I needed to do this because his family was robbed of the opportunity to watch my girl grow up. But if the truth is told, then now they know and it is something they have to live with now. I have done all I can. I can live with myself. I am the same wonderful loving and caring person I've always been only better now because I am older, wiser and more responsible. I am different but the same. What makes me different is I have grown up and became a wife and mother. I am very good at these jobs that God has given me. I am the very best me everyday and I can close my eyes at night knowing in my heart I have done all the right things and I have no regrets.

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

To Morph or Not to Morph

What am I talking about? Well, I've noticed that most bloggers sites are the same name as their etsy, twitter and face book pages. So the question is...Do I want to do this? Now or Later? hmmm, thinking. I'm gonna have to get back to this after more browsing and yep, thinking! I've been reading some other's views on what to blog and how to blog. Well, I'm a quick learner but I'm not sure if I want to conform just yet. I like my ramblings and this is for me to figure out who I am! What my purpose in life is. I choose to do it online because I can. I'm having a "I am female, here me roar" moment or maybe it's oppositional disorder? hehe

I read a lot. I always have and I am drawn to autobiographies and biographies. Don't get me wrong, I enjoy a good fiction book every now and again. However, I have lived a fiction book most my life (not the good kind either). I'm not wanting to boo hoo. I just want to be heard. To tell my story and since I don't see a book in the near future, I'm going to start here and end up there! Since I was very young, I decided I would right a book about my life before I die. I need to practice writing first. Find my style.

I know there are many books out there on child abuse survivors and many versions referring to this but no one lived my story but me. No one is alike, not even maternal twins. Our stories are as unique as we are. However, I will take time to proof read more and correct my grammar. It annoys me when other's don't, so I will do my best. Sometimes though, I do not feel well enough to. During those times I will not bother. You will have to ask yourself, to read or not to read?

Monday, June 25, 2012

Productive Energy

Okay, so I have the green coat of paint on my picket fence piece done and waiting for it to dry. Then, birds of a feather will flock together! I have my second vintage owl sanded, cleaned and ready for primer and I figured out exactly what I plan to do with them! I wasn't going to combine the pair but now I am and it is a secret! It will take some wood, nails and a hammer to pull together my idea. It will be sturdy as ever and clever in the end;-) There are clues in those last 2 statements of what my friendly owls are going to turn into! Give a guess in the comment section if you'd like. And, the last clue I'm going to give is they are going to be white!

Yeah, don't worry I plan on sticking to my day job. I'm not trying to become a poet anytime soon! Well, back to the topic of Reiki. I should know more than I know about this. I did know more but I've let it slip away by not using it. What a waste! Well, I'm going to buff up and start doing self-reiki. In the mean time, I'm going to work on designing my reiki blanket for me and my poor legs. I know some people don't believe in reiki and the healing potential it has like the guy that writes quackwatch, Stephen Barrett MD, on the web. I've read a few of his articles and I do not think very highly of them, him or his site. He obviously is very biased in his articles in my opinion. I think people should be open-minded to the possibility. If you haven't tried it don't knock! "Attitude my friend"! Ya know? He has probably never and will never receive a session from someone. Yep, I did it! Nope I don't watch it! First, I hated it but I feel using the Bunhead saying is appropriate here. "Attitude my friend"!

For those of you that do not know, Reiki is as old as the hills (as they say in WV)! It originated in the Eastern part of the world as a way to balance people's energy aka chakras, chi, qi, etc. That guy has got a long road to hoe, if he plans on proving we are not made up of energy. Dude, it's science! Close your eyes right know and then wait to see if you can feel someone moving closer to you. Warmth...yep that's right body heat is E-N-E-R-G-Y! Doesn't take a genius here! I remember being told (about disliking white rice), "How can a billion people be wrong?" Yeah, I didn't get it either but the point is for the love of MIKE, How can a billion people be wrong? I did it on myself, it helped my insomnia. Try it with an open mind and see how you feel afterwards. Can you believe that people believe in the power of Reiki so much they give free sessions! I'd give that quackwatch dr free sessions to change his mind. What would he have to lose? The bigger question is what does he have to gain? 

That question leads me into my "obsession" with my daughter! Imagine having an obsession with your child. Your dang right I have an obsession with my daughter and everything about her! I am her mother, she my child! I need to know where she came from and so does she. If for no other purpose than medically. She has Hashimoto Disease. I do not. Wonder where it came from. Do you even know? I'm waiting and I'm thinking. What is the right next move? So, many people have so many opinions. I have to decide for her. I will do the right thing by her and her alone. She is my only concern in this. I tried to be private and reasonable. I tried to be kind and giving. Everyone deserves a second chance even you. I will not carry your sins. I have my own soul to contend to. More prayer is necessary here before I move forward.

Sunday, June 24, 2012

I'm Alive

Well, I made it to the other side and have a whole new perspective on my fibro pain. It may be excruciatingly painful most days and the fatigue seems impossible to endure but at least I'm conscious. I have spent somewhere between 3-4 days passed out, sweating profusely and hallucinating off and on. I woke up today after sleeping maybe 3 hours restfully and showered. I had my breakfast and took my coveted antibiotic (seriously worse than being addicted to narcotics). Then headed out for food. Why out? Because when you haven't eaten in that many days you need the biggest dose of protein/carbs/fat/sugar you can get without worrying about "Is it healthy". Heck yeah it's healthy after starving for half a week! So, where did I go? Only the age old iconic fast food place that will provide all those things and more (sodium, and parts and pieces you do not want to know about). Yep you got it McD's!

After lunch, mom and I headed over to JoAnn Fabric's in Middleburg. I wanted scrap book paper to mod podge my outlet cover's with. Anyway, while I'm sitting on the floor like a kid (because I'm to old to squat) rummaging through fabric SALE paints, some lady asks my mom a question and that leads into the coolest beginning of a friendship ever (except for BF's of course;-)! She is close to my mom's age I'm guessing. She has a Reiki blanket with her! I thought I knew most everything about alternative medicine?! WTheck, how did I miss this?! Reiki blankets equals awesome! She is an awesome woman with a zest for life and we will be getting in touch with her soon! Oh and I wrapped myself in the blanket and she did some reiki stuff to me right there in the store and a little while later I felt great! I bought way to much scrap book paper unless I'm planning on covering the whole neighborhood! LOL

I have to mention my thoughts while standing in the scrap book isle. Well, one word actually. Martha! Good ole Martha! Boy was she busy or what while she was away? She came back from her time in with a BAM! That woman's name is on everything everywhere from housewares to scrap booking. Just wow!

So, I've been thinking of a good way to do this blog. What is being done so far? Lots of DIY, fashion, etc. many are topic constrained. I know I feel a strong need to share my life. I truely believe the cliche saying that if I say one thing that helps someone then I've served my purpose here. That's all I'm trying to do, is serve my purpose. God wants us to serve him by helping other's.   What can I do that I'm really REALLY good/great at? You got it! Talk! A Lot! If I had an Indian name it would have been little one who talks a lot. hehe. There may be folks out there that are annoyed with me that are rolling there eyes right this very instant but I'm okay with that. Not because I'm an egotistical maniac but because I know that when I share my life experience with other's I do help them. I have witnessed it. I am not ashamed about where I have come from or where I've been. God let's thing's happen to us so that we will make the decision to follow him. So that we will make the conscious choice to walk in his foot steps and be more like him. I don't know a lot about the Bible or religion but I'm trying to learn. I do know how to be honest and to make amends when needed. I do know how to admit my mistakes. I know how to love one another even in the face of controversy.

Well, that was a nasty long paragraph that I am not going to fix! Poop on grammar! I am a busy woman with kids and crafts and stuff;-) So, anyhoo, that's what I'm up to right now! I'm thinking eventually morphing this into a topic a week type blog comments welcomed (obviously) and then throwing my daily stuff in when I'm feeling well enough to do so. I'm going to keep thinking on this. In the mean time, gonna go get new pads on my flute this week and buy a music stand! It's time to climb on that horse again! Yeehaw!

Saturday, June 23, 2012

Death's Doorstep

aka Sinus Infection! I have been in the grips of an evil death-like infection for 3 days. I collapsed in a heap of blankets and pillows 2 days ago in the darkest room in the house and sweat it out, profusely mind you. Periodically I would feel little arms hugging me and asking me if I was going to be okay. I love my kids! I have instilled in them the characteristic empathy. This makes me proud! I'm still not back to my normal fibro-self but I have rejoined the family in living room (passed out on the couch). I do not cope with sickness well that is accompanied by a fever with aches and pain. It just seems to throw me over the edge. I'm in so much pain on a daily basis and it just seems to tip the scale. Well, enough talk about sickness. I had some cool things I wanted share about!

First off, we put our third item in our Etsy shop, Maddie's Treasure Shop! That is exciting, even if nothing ever sells. It's about having the courage to put ourselves out there without worrying about what other people think. That does not come easy for most of us. I scan other peoples sites, shops and blogs and that evil voice in my head says, "yours is not good enough". I just tell it to shut up and keep going forward. What kind of example would I set if I quit now do to fear. I write about a lot of things and it is all full of passion at that moment. You have to be passionate about what your writing and honest. That in itself will attract other's. https://www.etsy.com/listing/102667517/pleasantville-inspired-apron

The second thing I wanted to blog about the other day is that I discovered this really cool concept that started in NY and has branched out. It's about bartering for education. What a great idea. I've always had a strong opinion on bartering and education. I always wanted to trade massage therapy but finding people to trade with was the difficult part. A few years back, I found a college student to trade with and it blossomed in to friendship. It was beautiful! I gave her a massage and she taught me yoga once a week for about a year. I think we could really sustain if we bartered more with each other. This particular Trade School found teachers to teach a variety of classes from composting to computer skills and then the students bartered with the teachers to pay for the class. So if I taught a class on how to sew, you could pay me with vegetables from your garden or mow my grass. Their thoughts were that everyone has something to trade and no barter is too small. Well, I'm going to think on this because there is not one near me. Here's the link if you would like to go check it out. http://tradeschool.coop/newyork/class

 If my lack of editing bothers you, get over it! I have more important fish to fry! (saying that is my way of having courage, hehe) Now, back to the couch for another long period of unconscious-nous!

Thursday, June 21, 2012

Purpose driven...

After a high protein-low fructose lunch and a shower to regulate my internal temperature yesterday, I felt great! Then I turned around and did too much. That's my nature. I take advantage of feeling well and then pay dearly. I could do less. Either way, the way I feel in body and energy is so unpredictable. It's like a roller coaster all day everyday!

So, anyway, let me tell you what I did while feeling great! Well, to start I never got that apron pic'd and listed because I got lost in my studio in the garage. I found a smallish piece of old picket fence in the neighbors trash:-) Yes, I trash pick! I think everyone in Cleveland does. I went on my first "run" a couple of weeks ago before this fibro spell. It was a blast! My vision of old to new is improving. Thank goodness for pinterest:-p Anyway back to the fence, I cleaned it and got out my circular saw (read the manual really fast) and cut off the rotted section! Wahoo! Then, I found a scrap of wood to cut and nail on to the bottom. I cleaned up the wood and put my first coat of paint on. I should have taken pics or video'd a tutorial, bleek!

Then, I went thrift shopping with my mom a couple hours later. 

$25 for all! Small pile of wood, several large spools of vintage satin/velvet ribbon, several yards of beautiful plum velvet fabric, large decanter and a pewter vase! Yay!! Watch for these things to be used in projects in the near future!

I returned home and had to down a bunch of motrin and make an ice pack the size of my entire back! My spine felt like it was being ripped out of me or something awful. I slept until morning pretty much. Today's forecast-achy all over with a 100% chance of fever, beautiful!

Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Lions, Tigers and Doctors

Oh my! Who invented computers to answer telephones and why?! I am so exasperated! And, when I do talk to someone I am told wrong department, given a different number then transferred. Then, that dept picks up and says wrong number, given the number I just came from and transferred back to that number! OMGawd! LOL It took a few minutes on hold to realize I had wrote the same number down twice, oh me. I have made multiple calls this morning for multiple kids, including myself and I do not know if I accomplished anything. My arms are so fatigued now I can only rest them on the table and type (while shaking). I know everybody experiences this annoying phone system stuff at one time or another but it is an area of huge frustration for me. I have a lot of patience but never enough for THE Phone Systems.

Up next, Maddie started her extended school year at the autism school. Unfortunately for Abi I have to start her back up too because I wasn't able to finish her due to this fibro spell I am going through. I keep thinking it's over and then BAM! I wake up in the morning and can't hold my own body weight up (like I weigh so much). After home schooling, I have to get my hubby to carry my mannequin outside to take pics of the first apron to hit our shop! I remember making my first apron in health economics in high school-Oh my! It turned out looking like a pink flamingo standing on one leg?! Have I improved? Yes, with my mama's help. I designed my own wedding dress and with help from mama put it together. I'll have to find a pic and put it on here. I think I saw that box somewhere in the basement.

I went over to Ellen's pages to see if I could find a thought of the day or something to lift my spirit. The only thing I came up with is a question for "Ellen". Does she really post on her FB and Twitter pages or does someone get paid to do the typing for her?

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

Why Blog?

Well, why not! Folks blog for a multitude of reasons. I could list them all but then I would probably have to do a footnote or citation, blah! So, I will just ramble about my own personal reasons. My first most primal reason is to get what's in my head out. I do not have one specific interest I want to write about. I prefer to use blogging like a daily journal or diary, if you will. I have a plenitude of life experience from surviving child abuse to drug abuse and mommyhood to autism. It takes a lot of courage to share the life that I so willingly share.

My husband was telling me about a book he was reading the other day. He said that extroverts talk to talk through things and introverts think before they talk, so as to say exactly the "right" thing. He, also, said that when extroverts are at a social gathering they will talk to many people about everything just grazing the surface so as not to go to deep. Yet, I find that ironic because the things extroverts (meaning me) share is usually fairly intimate information about themselves. Lastly he said that introverts usually think to themselves, "why on earth would you share that intimate information about your life with anybody"! LOL I have to laugh there because this is an exact of my husband and I. Any idea how many times I'll say something to someone and he'll get this strange look on his face like I've said something wrong! Well, in conclusion of the book, the point is neither way is necessarily right or wrong it just is human character. No one needs to change here! The book was about how to learn to read what kind of type each person you meet is. Then, it goes on to tell you how to approach them for networking purposes.

Well, now that I have completely lost my focus. We have the best pediatrician ever! Sometimes a bit quirky and she let's her "pet peeves" be known but she calls at 10pm to talk for an hour about my children, their many ailments and treatments. (check out that giant sentence that I'm not going to fix, hehe). It's not all business either! She jokes around a bit too!

Actually, I'm going to break my proof reading rule and just post it. I can always edit tomorrow:-) Night Y'all!

Monday, June 18, 2012

Vitamin D

Two posts in one day? Oh, my! Yup, that's right! I can barely hold my eyes open but it has been such the day that I'm forcing myself to stay up and on the computer for "ME" time. I'm gonna get that me time one way or another, even if it kills me! LOL

Anyway- I woke up to sick kids, screaming kids, kids peeing in their beds and then headed out to take the twins to an occupational therapy evaluation. Which resembled a 3 ring circus more so than anything else! We found out that both twins need orthotics and Eli needs a brace for his left leg. Can't just one of my kids not need something? Just one I ask?! "Well, pull 'ur boot straps up kid", as my dad always said! Not that I ever listened to anything he said, however he's got a point here. There are some thing's in life you have to do this for and then there are those things you just don't! Oh, and just for the sake of mentioning it so I can have a real pity party, we have had to defrost are self-defrosting fridge once a week every week for like 4 weeks now! Bleek :'-/

2 really great things that happened today:

 1) We got this really cool UV thingy attached to our filter in the basement (discount:-). It kills all the mold, mildew and bacteria before the air comes upstairs! Awesome!!

2) I got a letter in the mail from the doctor and apparently, my Vitamin D is low! So, I need another supplement and some sunshine with my trusty sunhat, of course!

Yay me! I might start feeling a little better and not have so much pain in the near future. I have to do a recheck in 6 weeks, so I guess that's approximately how long it'll take. I wonder if it will improve my spelling? I hate that I've been suddenly losing my ability to spell most words! Since it came on rather quick I think this might be the reason. Time to do some Vitamin D research! And now it's after midnight, yawn:-0

Frontier Natural Products Co-op 23422 Schiff Calcium Calcium-Magnesium with Vitamin D 100 softgels

Father's Day Belated

I started a post yesterday but struggled to find what to write. Then I had a whole paragraph and bumped the wrong key and lost half of it! So, I tried my hand at cookies. I burnt a batch and dropped a batch (oops). I started 4 aprons which are coming along nicely and will be in my Etsy shop soon. My big girls made it home safely after 5 days of being at my sister's in another state. I was turned down again by the ex's family on Saturday. That made me very sad! They are afraid. I understand. Maybe someday they will want to meet her.

Here's my Father's Day FB post: "Although this day may be bittersweet for me, it is more sweet than bitter! Estranged from my own father and Madeleine estranged from her bioSperm Dad, I don't get it. I don't get why a father wouldn't want a relationship with their own children. Thank you bioSperm dad I am eternally grateful for you without you I wouldn't have Madeleine. The wonderfully sweet part of today is a wonderful, thoughtful man came into my life when I was 5 months pregnant and stepped up to the plate without a second thought. We pushed "our" first child out together. Thank you James Bischof for being the man you are, thank you God and his mother for bringing James into this world for me. I am so grateful for all I have and you have given me. It may be cliche to say but you are my night n shining armor, my prince charming. It takes someone very special to take another man's child into your heart and keep her as your own! I know I love you that much more because of this and I know she will feel the same about you once she totally grasps what you mean to us. I hit my knees and said Lord please don't let me do this alone and you brought James. Thank you! I love you James Bischof! You have made my life complete. You have made Madeleine's life complete. Thank you for all the children you have given me and for being the best daddy in the world!♥♥♥"

I don't really believe the whole biosperm crap that I wrote but that is how his family views it.

Abi just polished of 1 1/2 Fructose Free waffles and 2 Daddy's Day cookies. Maddie couldn't stop playing a computer game long enough to pose for a pic! 

So, after the big girls got home we gave my husband and the best daddy ever his present of yummy Oatmeal Chocolate Chip Fructose Free (for ABi) cookies that survived me!  LOL

Saturday, June 16, 2012

Date Night

Verso Casual Italian Restaurant verso-restaurant.com locally owned Parma, Ohio

Delici! Delish!! Yummy Tummy!!! We haven't been out to eat by ourselves since winter. This is our neighborhood find! Yelp.com is how we found it back then and we loved it so much we decided to go there again. The review said something about Parma being a black hole. I don't know about that but this restaurant is a great find!

Up first was an artistic presentation of Garlic Knots- house made dough, garlic (obviously), butter, romano and marinara dipping sauce. This could have been our supper it was so delicious and fulfilling. I had a salad and my hubby had Wedding soup (forgot pics), also delicious! Next up was my hubby's choice entree', Tequila Shrimp- shrimp, caramelized onion, roasted red pepper, tequila, sweet cream and cavapatti.  My entree', Tortellini Alfredo- tortellini, spinach, mushroom, sun dried tomatoes and garlic cream alfredo. Man O' man of chevvets what a crazy delicious meal!

We were home with full bellies and lots of leftovers for snacking on today in under 2 hours. Our last semi quiet day before the big girls return from their fun filled trip! Nap time;-)

Friday, June 15, 2012

Express Yourself

June 15, quote of Ellen's Day, "Express Yourself"! You go Ellen! That's what I'll do:-] Uh wait! Is it possible, Ellen, to express yourself to much? Um Ellen-I was just perusing your site and I found Lady Gaga under the Gentle Barn section? What's up with that? Is that like sending Lady Gaga to the dog house? Well, anyway if you click on this link you'll have a chance to win a copy of Lady Gaga's signed book. Good luck! Did I happen to mention, I love Ellen! Not in a "in love" kind-of-way but love her! She has uplifted my spirit and I have made a conscious decision to change this year all because of Ellen DeGeneres! Thanks Ellen for being you!<3

Go to my first post (Entry #1-that's the title) ever to see my, all because of Ellen, life changing plans!

Now moving on to me, I have been expressing myself to much apparently! I've been told by my ex's family that being honest is not important! That wanting to live up to my values (not lying, being honest no matter how painful, making amends no matter how painful)  is selfish! Huh, who knew! Okay sorry for finally realizing how stupid and selfish I was 10 years ago when I stole your rights from being grandparents (Not my idea but I followed through with your's son suggestion)!! No that wasn't selfish not at all! They want to know what I think I can gain from telling them and my daughter that each other exists?! Does anybody else agree that if I wanted something I would have drug his butt to court 10 years ago or any other year in between?

Let's move on to the daughter. My daughter, my life line, my first love ever! Need I say more? Wouldn't after reading that description you want to meet her? How about if I add in she has his freckles and quirkiness? Which makes her hilarious and her IQ 132 (superior/very Superior). How about her love for reading, music, history and above all nature and all that it holds! Anything yet? Still not in the least bit interested in meeting her? hmm, well I can wait. I have time to keep trying (and don't worry I will) because she is worth knowing; someday you'll come around and agree.

So, In conclusion of this post I want to leave you with one question to ponder about: If you were to find out you were going to die tomorrow, would you want to meet her then? Anybody?

Wednesday, June 13, 2012

De Pain boss De Pain

Fantasy Island was one of my Fav television shows growing up! I had a little crush on Tattoo, little haha! I amuse myself:-)

My pain is excruciating today. Yesterday, I thought I was finally over this fibro relapse (I made that up). So, I finally stopped pinning, fbing, etc and started a project. I can't wait to get it done and share it with the world! I have one rule, the 1st of anything made must be put in the store! Must! Dude, we can't live on air alone! The older girl's are in WV visiting my sister for 5 days. I hope to get a few things done and some needed rest. I don't know how many more days I can take before I finally get in the Cleveland Clinic Pain Management Program. This feels like my last resort before I succumb to narcotics! I mean what can it hurt, right! Point is I already hurt so why not give it my all!

Madeleine's occupational therapist told me yesterday that she has achieved 4 of her 8 goals we set 2-3 months ago. Now that is success! I love that kid so much! I wish her bio dad did too! Oh well, his loss my hubby's gain, right?!

Look at those beautiful exclamation points people:-D I have to go prepare for an appointment tomorrow that I forgot about mostly because I never know what day of the week it is. I love my long winded sentences(run on, hehe) but I detest misspelled, misused words so please feel free to correct me. It'll be like free writing tutoring!

Sunday, June 10, 2012

4 Months Later

Nice,eh? 4 months later! Great posting time!! First I forgot I started a blog, then I stumbled across it and LOL! Then I decided it was stupid and wasn't going to share it...well, I'll think about that. I read my first post and decided to change my username Unknown to KBischof. Apparently, I thought unknown was funny at the time since my blog is called Who Am I? It took forever to figure out how to change it! After I did I had to go back and reread that entry because I forgot what it said! So, the reason for "4 Months Later" is because I turned around and did exactly what I said I wasn't going to do. I added more to my plate. I went and got a job for 2 months and I've been in bed recovering for 3 yes 3 weeks! I, also turned 39 during that time. 39 but I feel like 89!

Well, I can go ahead and add 2 more things to my Who I Am Not list. My part time job was Activities Assistant at a Skilled Nursing Unit. I loved it and after my last weekend I couldn't get out of bed to care for myself or my children. I'm still not back up more than 20% of the time but I am slowly recuperating. So, if I can't do a part time job there as activities asst which was A LOT of walking! Then I'm guessing I can scratch off STNA/LPN/RN! Well that's more than 1 job there and I was really leaning toward it for my future Who Am I title! I really loved those old people and the activities though. Wait a minute...I feel like I'm 89 and I like those kind of activities! I guess I will make a good old person! LOL

I have a unique style of writing that I just noticed. I use a lot of exclamation points and ... and this is another reason I am not sure if I will make this public. I can't stand the idea of putting myself out there for people to see and criticize me. Notice that my mind tells me that that is what people will do. I do not know if I was born this negative or if I evolved into it.

Okay, so let's review my New Year's Resolves! I filled my plate too full immediately after I said I wouldn't. I did successfully diet down 16 pound a roos! Yay Me!! I still have 25 more to come off but I'll worry about that later (a guarantee).

I'm gonna skip Past Memories for a while, which is where I left off. I'm going to explain why I can't get out of bed. Since, if you have managed to read this far you are probably wondering what's wrong with me. I have Fibromyalgia! There I said it and I'll say it again I have Fibromyalgia! And for all those skeptics in the world that I have encountered since I was 6 years old,Frontier Natural Products Co-op 23422 Schiff Calcium Calcium-Magnesium with Vitamin D 100 softgels I have Fibromyalgia!! Got it! Yes, it is a syndrome because they couldn't think of anything else to call it. That doesn't mean it doesn't exist or that it doesn't hurt because I'm here to tell you it does and it does!

For those of you that do not know what it is, defined by Mayo Clinic Staff, "Fibromyalgia is a disorder characterized by widespread musculoskeletal pain accompanied by fatigue, sleep, memory and mood issues".