DIYin' It

Collage: Relax during a renovation? This could be you!
Image Credit: MS Office ClipArt: home, living room, couple, relaxing
2011 @ wobuilt.com 
Yeah, Right! If only!

 Wow, what a busy full filling day! I was up early after an actual night of uninterrupted sleep. I had a hard time getting started but pushed (by the twins) I got moving. Blog, Coffee, removed nasty disintegrating carpet from stairs, delegated the sweeping and mopping of them:-), sanded a few with new electric sander, made round 2 of home made laundry detergent, crocheted a lot and fed and played with kids around all of that. Although in Isabelle's opinion not enough, as she stood at the gate saying, "mommy, mommy, mommy, mommy..." and you get the picture! I feel tired and accomplished. Oh and I got a hard nap in for an hour!

I'm afraid of how I'll feel for the next few (2 weeks) days after all that but someone has to do it! This is not really my hubster's idea of fun, which is why I'm doing the renovating of the house. Although, he will help when asked I know he would rather not and that's okay because he does so much else around here. He takes the kids to school and therapies, washes the laundry, and makes muffins on Sunday. All the while trying to work from home (may not be the best idea), it's hard to get things done with us around demanding his time.

So, I made the second round of home made laundry detergent from this post, http://dazedandcreative.blogspot.com/2012/07/home-made-laundry-detergent.html. Although I swore I would not let it boil this time, I failed terribly! It was going well. I had a plan. Then Abi was thirsty. Then Izzy and Bud were too! And, BOIL! I rush to turn the heat down and stir. Then I start crocheting and....BOIL! Seriously, well maybe next time I will NOT boil it! Who knows what the end result is supposed to be; mine is not as thick looking as the tutorial I used but the clothes come clean.

Some pics from today's hard work:

Nasty Carpet we've been walking on!

Black stuff is the 40 year old glue!

Here in Cleveland, no place to build but up!

Close up of glue after scrapping!

Same stair after sanding!

Space before the first step, glue still there, hrrumph!

I need some Home Depot help! Anyone out there know how to get rid of that glue? Please ask your hubby's or someone and let me know!


Namaste,
Kim

R-e-l-i-e-f

How do you spell relief? And, I don't mean the plop plop fizz fizz kind! It has been just over a year since Madeleine's Autism Spectrum diagnosis and I finally have relief! Why, tell me does a child fall through the cracks for 8 years? I'm not a complacent parent but I couldn't get anybody to "see it"! Does that mean it was me making it up? Heck no! I know there are those people, many of those, that think your stupid if you diagnosis yourself or one of your loved ones. Believe me I have family member's that make fun of me and call me a hypochondriac! And, yep your right, it feels just dandy when they do!

Am I? Heck no! If you read any information at all about the Autism Spectrum you would read that it says if you suspect your child may have it ask your doctor. Well, I followed those directions and she said there was no way! Obviously (to me now) is that there just wasn't enough information or research on it 9 years ago but 4 years ago there was. I found it! How is it all doctors didn't know about it or at least all pediatricians? How could they over look my concern just because she spoke and spoke well. As time passed, I had already begun implementing the therapies I was finding on the internet. By the time she was diagnosed she was able to look everyone and anyone in the eye's no thanks to any professionals! It was all me!

I trained her to do that, I trained her on what to do when you are mad instead of self mutilation. Yes, she was 5 and self mutilating when she was angry. It was terrifying to be me. No one believed me not even my husband. In his defense, he knew there was something wrong with her just not what. Ironically, he pushed me to have Abigail checked before I even suspected Maddie. I spent the next 5 years trying to not convince but get anyone to open their eyes and see what I could clearly see. I was even able to narrow it down to two different disorders the question was which one. It took moving out to the middle of no where Nebraska to stumble across an Autism Center and they are who examined, tested and diagnosed her but we were there almost 1 1/2 yrs before we found that help. It was through the twins pediatrician.

So why did I jaunt down this windy path today? What triggered my thought process? She has reached 7-8 of her current OT goals since Feb of this year. It is amazing! She wears all clothes and looks like a girl and "trendy"! She can ride her bike without training wheels! She goes to an Autism school in the area! Which BTW, most of my family didn't even believe her diagnosis until after the city schools diagnosed her here and she was accepted into the autism school. Best news, she was given the $20,000 autism grant to pay for the school. Which, unfortunately costs more than that.

I am so happy and proud of my girl! We will not leave Cleveland until Madeleine doesn't need Cleveland anymore. Looks like I better go unpack the rest of those boxes I think we are gonna be here a while.

Namaste,
Kim

Dealing with Anger Part 2

Tip: Got joint pain and inflammation, including in the mouth, gums, throat and tonsils? Drink hot sage tea!

Finaaallly! I know I promised this a week ago or longer! I'm a slacker! Got pent up anger? Are you taking it out on the wrong person? The Bible says, Be angry but do not sin! Responding vs. Reacting to this strong emotion. To catch up you may want to read Dealing with Anger Part 1 that I posted. http://dazedandcreative.blogspot.com/2012/07/dealing-with-your-anger-part-1.htmlhttp://dazedandcreative.blogspot.com/2012/07/dealing-with-your-anger-part-1.html

Addressing anger is what we are supposed to do. Everyone can control their anger, if they want to, will you? But how do we do this? We need to learn to control our anger. Let's explore ways to through listening to Dr. Gary Chapman from Moody Radio on Today in the Word. http://www.moodyradio.org/radioplayer.aspx?episode=91101 In that post, I mentioned that we first have to let the anger subside, then we can share why we are angry. God always told why he was angry to whom he was angry to. It's a process just like anything else eg. grieving, etc.

How to share it with the person that has made you angry: "I'm feeling angry right now, but don't worry I'm not going to take it out on you". This is one of the lines that Dr. Gary Chapman has couples memorize to prepare for marriage. "But I do need your help, when you get time I'd like to talk about it".

The whole purpose in both sets of relationship posts from last month, http://dazedandcreative.blogspot.com/2012/07/confrontation-in-relationships.html is to make things between you and the other person right. Seeking resolution. Is it possible you overreacted? After speaking with the person you may discover this. And, if not then that person, in an ideal wold, apologizes to you! Wouldn't it be great if everyone could and would do this?! I started focusing on saying I'm sorry when I am wrong even to my children. If I raise my voice (scream) as a reaction to something they have done, I am letting the anger control me and my actions. I apologize, not usually 'til I've calmed down and realize what an idiot I was but I go to them and say, "Mommy is sorry and should not have screamed for no reason. There are better ways to communicate."

Anger Issues

1) Shutting the other person down=pent up feelings of anger. I have developed a very bad habit of how I react to anger. The minute I hear that tone in their voice, I stiffen up and prepare for battle. Often saying I don't appreciate the tone you are using or I wish you wouldn't speak to me that way. We do this to our kids a lot but most often it is better to let the "tone" slide in these moments and hear the message behind the tone.

2) React with anger to their anger which is a human trait (that can be changed)Didn't your mama ever tell you, 2 wrongs do not make a right? Mine did!  Proverbs 15:1 a soft answer turns wrath away. We need to and I need to let them get it out. Don't take the tone (my tone) personally (my hubster;-p) Don't make little comments that throw fuel on the fire. Yep, we do that and then we say that!

3) Storing anger up for the winter is not spiritual.  We are not squirrels! The emotion anger is not a sin. Remember it's purpose is to set things right in relationships with others. Don't say, "I'm upset" when you are really angry. Have you ever met a bitter person? "Anger was meant to be simply a visiter not a resident." It is a sin to keep it repressed within us because it will make you loathe the person. The Bible says do not be enslaved by anger.Often pent up anger can lead to depression. Do you have road rage? It may be you have undealt with feelings of anger.

Hey, I got some homework for me and you:

1) Don't forget anger is a feeling that comes from God to help us. Be thankful. Due date: Eternally

2) Get alone with God, ask God what you are angry about, write it down. Due date: Sooner

3) Start talking about anger and help other people deal with their anger. Due date: Later

Would love to hear comments from those of you taking the time to read this blog o mine! You may contribute in a way that helps me and other's. You do not need to be a member to comment but if you wanted to join my blog to help raise my low-self esteem that would be great;-)

Namaste,

Kim